We all feel anxious from time to time and that is pretty normal. Going for an exam, interview or doing something for the very first time makes us go through certain different changes in our body and brain and thats absolutely fine. But, if that feeling makes us go through certain changes in our body and brain which is not acceptable, then it’s a matter of concern. It can be CHRONIC ANXIETY.

CHRONIC ANXIETY is totally a different thing entirely!

1 If you are feeling that you miss some part of the conversations in the present as you are busy lost in your own thoughts

2 you feel that the situations can control you or you are in control of the situations.

3. you always think of the worst scenarios.

4. Feeling uptight, exhausted, on the edge all the time.

5. Everytime worrying and waiting for the next panic attack to happen.

Yes, obviously there are many things that can make us anxious, but, but, but, that are only thoughts/ opinions not a fact.They doesn’t define us.

May be whatever has happened to you in your past, you have made it your reality and you are still living your life with it. OR
may be your habits in the past which are restricting you to act in your present.

Now what to do ??

If you understand to acknowledge these habits which are producing anxiety, you will work to undo them and gradually you can let yourself free from the trap of Anxiety ?

Isn’t this sounds cool??

Let’s learn how!

1 Avoiding Discomfort/ uncertainity :

It’s very normal to say that we want to act as per plans and when something happens beyond our plans, we feel very sad, bad and anxious too. To avoid uncertinity we keep on thinking in a loop.We all are wired to avoid uncertainity, I remember one of my relative whenever some unexpected guests use to arrive at their home, she use to feel bizzarre .To see her room in a state that is not desired according to her own expectations and the rule set by the society gave her that feeling. To look perfect at any cost!

We often don’t want to try new things, the feeling of failure comes in between. What kind of life it is ?? we don’t want to take the risks, we don’t want to leave our comfort zones

Just try to push yourself out of your comfort zones and see what happens??

Avoiding uncertainity in the shorter term will help you ofcourse to get rid of Anxiety but will maximise in the longer term

Few examples are :

1 Getting admission in your favorite college but as soon as you hear that your friends are not accompanying you,you become anxious

2 Getting an invitation for a dinner party where you don’t know anyone can make you anxious

3 Getting a chance to present yourself in a seminar but thinking of speaking and making mistakes is making you anxious

We all want to feel safe and whenever any event comes our fear center in the brain takes an immediate step to sense the danger and makes you anxious and that’s actually good as it releases a hormone adrenaline which activates your fight and flight ✈️ mechanism and as you don’t want to fight, you take a flight

Remember the third example when you got a chance to perform at a seminar,what you did instead of making mistakes and speaking you tried to escape

Take this as my helping hand towards you, a tip :

Accepting comfort is easy but it will not help you grow. Avoiding uncertainity will help you to relieve your short term anxiety. but it will become your habit to avoid things BUT ON THE CONTRARY WELCOMIMG UNCERTINITIES WIL. HELP YOU YOU TO GET RID IF LING TERM ANXIETY AND BUILD GROWTH AND CONFIDENCE

2 Avoiding Rejection:

We human on a daily basis get Rejection. But how many of us are ready to accept Rejections. We hate to feel helpless. The urge to control the uncontrollable is very strong.

To control the uncontrollabe makes us anxious. Like uncertainity and discomfort, some amount of helplessness can’t be avoided.

We create high hopes and expectations from people and when its not fulfilled, we say to ouself , ” HOW CAN THEY DO THIS DO TO ME “? WE FEE REJECTED, LEFT OUT AND HELPLESS TOO!

We get overly involved in other’s lives even when they are not interested or not said ,and it stresses us too!

We keep ruminating about our and others’ mistakes done in the past and feel that something could they have done at that time , wasting their present time and energy. This rumination in our heads makes us more rejected and we label us and others’ ‘how could I have done this mistake ? What a fool I was ? they shouldn’t have done this to me ? ALL BLAME GAMES AND NOTHING WE GET APART FROM ANXIETY , STRESS AND DEPRESSION.

Take 10 minutes of your day and do sef reflection or introspection, may be probaably you will be able to find out that you are trying to control those areas of your life which is uncontrollable

Worrying makes you feel productive that you are doing something important but automatically it is draining you and clogging the pores of brain which are meant to analyse and think

Accept your anxiety and then you will able to identify the thoughts and habits behind it, and then automatically you can work on it.

Happy 📚 Reading

Deepika Oberoi